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Archive for November, 2007

Sam’s 5th Birthday!

Posted in Adoption, Cambodia, Family, International Adoption, Island life, NaBloPoMo, Seychelles on November 11, 2007| 9 Comments »

A birthday has been had and a boy is now five.

The event was a huge success. Sam was thrilled to bits about everything from the way his planned menu turned out … roast chicken, grilled red snapper, coconut crab curry, rice, eggplant chutney, pumpkin salad, roast potatoes … to the musical candle and sparkler in the shape of a 5, to the wonderful company, to the raft of gifts.

Mark’s family considered me cruel to the extreme for not letting Sam open any gifts until after dinner. The giddy charm of anticipation eludes them completely, so they consider placing wrapped presents in plain view to be slavered over for days in an ever-increasing frenzy of expectation and suspense little more than torture.

How many times over the course of the evening I heard, usually from my husband’s mother, some oblique reference to Sam’s fortitude and my cruelty over the apparently arbitrary wait to satisfy curiosity with some furious wrapping paper demolishing.

My mother, on the other hand, sent an email in total support of the enforcement of a period of anticipatory agony.

“It’s the best part,” she reminded.

Even Sam admitted as much under the influence of afterglow this morning, acknowledging that long longing made the revealing more fun and stretched out the excitement over a longer period than simple gift opening frenzy would allow.

Keeping in mind that many things kids in the real world take for granted and have seen time after time are completely unknown on this island, you will see in the photos that a Spiderman suit complete with built-in muscles was the cat’s pajamas … so to speak … although much too hot in a non-breathing polyester sort of way to be Sam’s pajamas no matter how dear his wish was never to remove this perfect fit of an alter ego.

(Sent from Utah by my friend Holly along with a bounty of Americana, she provided this piece de resistance … triceps de isometrics?)

A tiny china tea set from my mom was a big hit with Cj, who spent the rest of the evening pouring.

With my boy well sated, I’m figuring I now have a couple of weeks before the pre-Christmas mania begins to build.

Enjoy the photos.

Before the party

Sam and Cj before the party.

SamSpidey

Casual Spidey

Spidey pose

Spidey pose, Spidey pose, doing the thing only a spider does

Happy Birthday Boy

Such a happy Birthday Boy!

Happy Cj, too, with her very first tea set

Cj’s Tea Set

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Cambodian news and announcements for the week

Posted in Adoption, Cambodia, International Adoption on November 10, 2007| Leave a Comment »

News and announcements for families with Cambodian connections have been posted on my International Adoption Blog.

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So great a loss

Posted in Island life, Seychelles on November 9, 2007| 6 Comments »

I’ve just returned from Marianne Hodoul’s funeral, and not even puppies can cheer me up enough to write a zesty post.

The Baie Lazare church was packed; everyone from this area, of course, and a lot of dignitaries were in the crowd. Very appropriately, it rained.

Apparently, three men are being held in connection with Marianne’s murder at the moment. One was released from prison only a few months ago after beating his girlfriend and leaving her for dead. She survived … barely … and he served all of about three years for his crime.

Marianne was a kind and gentle person and she is well missed by many who loved her and others who appreciated her calm and simple ways.

Because her murder was so brutal, in addition to mourning Marianne everyone is terrified. Our peaceful world has been shattered and we are all paying attention to the reminder that any of us can be a target. Drugs are now making their way into Seychelles, with heroin … unheard of here only a few years ago … tallying up victims faster than anyone can follow. Crime is on the way up, hand-in-hand with fear. The police are under-prepared and, like those in almost all the world, unable or unwilling to stop the traffic in and the sale and use once here.

People are beginning to build walls around their homes, install electric gates, hire private security companies.

Yes, Marianne’s death also seems to mark the death of an era, a way of life that can no longer survive. The days of peaceful island living are gone. We have now joined the real world.

I am so sad today. Sad. Angry. Frightened. And worried for the future for my children.

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We be ‘pupulatin’

Posted in Family, Fun, Island life, NaBloPoMo, Seychelles, tagged , , on November 8, 2007| 4 Comments »

It’s a ‘pupulation’ explosion, and we’re knee deep in cute. By Christmas we’ll be pooping precious around here.

Our dog Dinah gave birth to eight of these little sweeties, and being the great mom that she is, they’re doing very well.

There are details … sort of … on one of my pro blogs here if you’re interested in more of the pupdate.

Sam Cj Puppies ©2007 SHBenoiton
Sam and Cj and puppies, oh my!

Puppy Paw ©2007 SHBenoiton

Wanna shake? Here’s my paw …

Puppybutton©2007 SHBenoiton

And here’s my tummy button … it’s that little thing there below my great big head.

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Animals rule

Posted in Island life, NaBloPoMo, Seychelles on November 7, 2007| 3 Comments »

My dog had eight puppies last night, and the fruit bat that powers my Internet access has apparently been unwell all day.

Photos may follow, but this is all I’m doing today.

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What DO women want?

Posted in NaBloPoMo, Older women, Younger men, tagged , , , , on November 6, 2007| 14 Comments »

Who is this guy?

I’m other-side-of-the-planet out of the loop, so may possibly be forgiven for never, until today, having heard of Steve Santagati, but I’ve just come across a blog post by him on the Huff Post.

He was apparently on a CNN program I’ve also never heard of, Showbiz Tonight, talking about a magazine I’ve never heard of, Maxim, and voicing opinions I have most certainly heard, but not for a while.

Divvying up what does or does not make the opposite sex desirable isn’t a conversation I’ve come across lately, so I was interested to learn what the buzz is in the real world late 2007.

Being some sort of expert on what makes women sexy in the eyes of men, he posts a Top Ten that addresses wardrobe (classy, but provocative), grooming (perfume should be present but not over-powering and it’s best if her hair is clean and of feminine length), temperament (can’t have a “sour puss” or get up on a soapbox and complain all the time), and humor (should be able to take a joke…even if it’s dirty), amongst other things.

Insisting that woman want “brutal honesty”, and admitting that 95% of us can “take it on”, he’s right tiffed by those who can’t … or possibly choose not to?

Because it’s his blog inspiring mine today, I’ll give him his Top Ten and a nod to the postulation that men find ‘sexy’ the quality most attractive, and since he’s never heard of me I’ll assume we’re square and turnabout being fair play I can join the game.

Not being a man, I would never assume to speak for my gender on anything, so my thoughts on what is hot on a man would be my own. Looks are part of the initial draw, but far too subjective, and a small part of the picture.

So, my Top Ten of what makes a man attractive looks like this:

1. He should look like he could care less about what he wears and not spend more than 30 seconds on his hair.

2. In reasonable physical shape, showing evidence of enjoying a good meal and the occasional ale is required.

3. He can be clumsy and goofy as long as he has a good laugh.

4. He must be good at listening AND hearing. (Eye contact is important, too.)

5. He shouldn’t smell like anything that can be purchased through Duty Free other than a good Single Malt.

6. He must be passionate about something.

7. He should not be whiny, ever have his mother do his ironing or freak out at the sight of bugs or snakes.

8. Loving kids and animals and being gentle goes a long way to making up for lost hair or other mere physical attributes that may be less than perfect.

9. An addiction to the written word is vital.

10. He must have honor, never lie, and be ready to protect those he cares for with his life.

Is this too much to ask? Not for me. And, by the way, this is not just the Top Ten for “What I looked for in a life partner.” This would also be the checklist for anyone looking to get laid.

Feel free to add your own thoughts …

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From NaBloPoMo to NaNoBloPoMo?

Posted in NaBloPoMo, Writing for a living, tagged , , on November 5, 2007| 4 Comments »

A question posed on this blog on the Huffington Post stopped my fingers mid-stroke this afternoon, and I’m still not at all sure how I’m feeling about it.

Titled “It’s ‘Only’ Words” and written by Carol Hoenig, the main gist is the upcoming writers strike, and she reminds us in the first sentence that:

Whether a writer is part of the Guild or not, it’s true we are an underpaid lot.

Well, AMEN, Sister. I’m right there with you on the solidarity front, rooting for Hollywood writers to finally get a piece of the action that is closer to proportional for their contributions. Why should Conan O’Brien get all the fame, glory AND money, when his witty asides are mostly scripted by some poor slob with a three-hour commute because she can’t afford to live any closer to work?

If there’s any way for me to help out, just let me know.

Oh. Wait a minute …

I wonder what would happen if all writers, from novelists to bloggers, decided to join in the strike. With that thought in mind, does my blogging without compensation make me part of the problem?

Whoa, Nelly!

But …

What WOULD happen if we all just stopped our write-for-free compulsion? Should NaBloPoMo be followed by NaNoBloPoMo?

Discuss …

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No time to get personal

Posted in NaBloPoMo on November 4, 2007| 2 Comments »

In addition to the NaBloPoMo challenge of daily posting … one I’m shouldering only on Paradise Preoccupied while taking some weekend time for my family rather than pour it all into the pro blogs … participation presents another venue for publishing content, making friends, joining discussions, sharing music, and ever so much more.

As if yet another offering of a pleasant way to kill hoursdaysweeks isn’t enough, the initial requirements for involvement are also time consuming as all get out. Filling in the blanks is a no-brainer, but takes a while. The big investment, however, comes with the overture to personalize.

I’d love to see a study of how much time people spend selecting an avatar, choosing a theme, picking widgets and coming up with a name to suit the identity they are creating. The pressure is on to project the perfect image, to convey just as much of yourself as you wish to reveal at first glance … only one chance to make a first impression.

Are you frankly scarlet, or does olive come closer to producing the mood you hope readers don as your page opens? Are you edgy and sharp, or softly ethereal?

Themes on NaBloPoMo range from Neon to Ice Cream, London to Zen, Gizmo to Gothic, and offer flexible sidebar colors, fonts, and of course CSS if you’re savvy and determined.

Remember the days when personalized letterhead seemed a lavish luxury, and more than a bit precious when done for private correspondence only?

We’ve come a long way, and I’m not at all sure the trend to make and remake images of ourselves for public consumption is a good thing. Could the compulsion to customize also be too precious? And if not precious, how about pressure?

How much of our stretched time should we eek out of our schedules to make the choices, embed the widgets, apply the themes? And what does it say about us when we do? Or if we don’t?

At the moment, personalizing my NaBloPoMo is way down my ‘to do’ list. Does that make me less a presence? Do I grow generic as pages without customization multiply as participation increases and available time decreases in so close to direct proportion? (Generic sounds an awful lot like geriatric, so am I doomed to be both someday soon?)

Be that as it may, perhaps spilling my guts will be enough to say “Sandra was here”.

Then again, there are lots of Sandras.

I know! I’ll be the Neon Sandra with the helvetica text and mauve sidebar and Clustermap widget. No one else in the whole world will look like me then …

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A NaBloPoMo Winner (blush)

Posted in Adoption, Family, NaBloPoMo, tagged , , , on November 3, 2007| 1 Comment »

NaBloPoMo, National Blog Posting Month, is just seeing the dawn of its third day and I have already managed to embarrass myself into being declared a winner.

Not that the point of the daily post-fest has anything to do with competition; in fact, the camaraderie building feels comfortably non-comptetitve and I’ve yet to see any announcement of prizes for “most compelling post on recipes using feta” or “best tips on cable knits”.

No, I won’t see any award, but kudos are coming, nonetheless, with one poster stating emphatically, “You win for the BEST story I’ve heard in a long time!” while another is shamelessly “*bowing deeply and kissing Sandra’s big toe in attitude of adoration*”.

To what do I owe these accolades so long coveted?

My big, fat mouth and my most embarrassing moment.

I should have known that any distinction I’d ever manage to achieve would end up having something to do with my innate talent for offensive verbosity, as even when trying really hard to make nice I oh-so-often end up leading an unintentional pas de deux that stumble-starts with a faux pas … a faux pas de deux, so to speak.

That’s what first attracted me to the topic … the discussion is here … a title that told me I could really get my teeth into this one: How Does Your Foot Taste?

The story I recounted for my new NaBloPoMo pals has been told before. I fessed up big time on one of my pro blogs a couple of years ago, but this seemed a perfect opportunity to trot it out again.

If you’ve not yet heard my “Ugly Baby Story”, check out either link, or both, for the whole train wreck. If after doing so you would like to join the ranks of those presently bestowing approbation upon me for my mortifying blunder …

Line on the left, one slap each.

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Remembering why …

Posted in Adoption, Island life, NaBloPoMo, Seychelles, tagged , , , , on November 2, 2007| 5 Comments »

In an effort to keep the beauty of my island home and all that is wonderful in my world in mind as the ugliness of life and death intrudes, I’m posting more photos today and saying little.
Bird/Sam rope ©2007SHBenoiton
My amazing son, Sam

Bird/Tortoise
A big, bird-poop spattered tortoise enjoying the attention (?) of my family.

BirdSootyTern©2007SHBenoiton
A sooty tern, up close and personal with a potential for poop spattering

My lovely family on a lovely beach ©2007SHBenoiton
My lovely family on a lovely beach on Bird Island

The Ent in my garden ©2007SHBenoiton

From my veranda at home, the Ent that lives at the bottom of my garden pointing at the hidded treasure on the hill opposite. (One day I’ll follow his finger and dig it up.)

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