Posts Tagged ‘The Pope’

Imagine this …

A brand of soap … we’ll call it Morning Glory … has experienced sagging sales, having been around for yonks and recently reputed to cause irritation, and worse.

In an effort to revive interest, maybe even bring in some new victims customers, a massive campaign is carefully planned, the main thrust of which is personal appearances by the company mascot, Mr. Glory himself.

With no change in the Glory formula in sight, the ad/PR machine is taking the “ram it down” tact, trotting out the same old slogans, offers and, of course, the big guns, and BIG TIME … a strategy that has worked for them time after time, and sold a lot of soap.

The UK is chosen as launch pad for the blitz, partly because Morning Glory’s reputation has been especially bitten on the ass in that country; rashes have broken out and some users have been permanently scarred.

A budget of £15 million is set … that’s a whole lotta soap.

Now, here’s the puzzling bit; the British government agrees to pay more than half of the bill, plus, plus.

Shocking, heh?

Okay, we’re not talking soap here, but another representation of morning glory called Pope Ben the Roman Numeral.

Yep … he’s bringing the road show to Britain and the British tax payers are picking up a huge part of the tab.

The total bill for the invited visit – without the cost of police and security – is estimated by the Foreign Office to be about £15m. Of this, £7m will come from the Catholic Church, the rest will be shouldered by taxpayers.

Ooooh. I know if I was still paying taxes in England I’d not be chuffed.

The monsignor coordinating the viz rationalizes this depletion of British coffers by passing the Popester off as “a head of state”, a definition the church cultivates actively, and since the Vatican is its own little world, carries some cred, but shouldn’t.

Yes, that’s my opinion; if they want to look like a State, they should pay taxes, and the pope should no more be invited to spew on global affairs than should Sun Yung Moon.

My fav bit, though, of the report is this:

So where is the Church going to find the £7m it has pledged to contribute?

… He said for the Papal visit the church hoped people would double their contributions to come up with close to a million.

Yeah … because the catholic church doesn’t have two pennies to rub together? Paaaaalllllleeeeeeaaaasssseeee …

When the head of this church gets around on an ass (pun intended), dresses in homespun and sells off the art collection, maybe … and only maybe … then there could be a point made for helping out a bit with his travel budget … like donating a week-long bus/tube pass.

Until that happens, though … frozen precipitation in perdition comes to mind as more likely … pope soap should fork out for its PR gigs.

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Not that I often do, but today let me not mince words here …

The United Nations is a self-perpetuating, money-sucking, basically useless organization that needs to go, for until it does there will never be a chance to replace this monster with something that actually works.

There are very few days that pass without something about the UN appearing in the press to piss me off, whether it be yet another expensively dressed Secretary General espousing shock over a situation that the rest of the world long ceased to find a revelation … Ban Ki-moon’s trip to Darfur was shameful … or successive trottings-out of statistics that spiral ever more rapidly downwards no matter how efficient the highly paid bean counters may be, and it takes only the sight of a convoy of brand spanking new white SUVs to get me spitting dust, much like the thousands lining the paths of said convoys.

The offering today? The “racism forum” set to open in Geneva and reports on the UN reaction to the boycotting of the conference by the US, Australia, Canada, Italy, Netherlands, New Zealand, Israel and Germany, amongst others.

In typical fashion …

UN human rights chief Navi Pillay has said she was “shocked and deeply disappointed” by the boycotts.

Oh, for fuck sake!

There’s that shock thing again. I’m thinking UN big shots should be a bit more clued up, heh?

The only world leader showing up … and speaking … is that wonder of gentle tolerance, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Holocaust denier extraordinaire, who will apparently be welcomed with open arms, handed the podium and encouraged to pour his tiny, rotten little soul out in front of yet another global audience provided so kindly by the UN.

The fact that the Pope has been called in to provide backup for this fiasco adds an element of crap.

The Pope has also spoken out in favour of the conference, saying it was an opportunity to fight discrimination and intolerance.

“We ask for firm and consistent action, at national and international level, to prevent and eliminate any form of discrimination and of intolerance,” he said.


Of course, this isn’t too surprising when the Church’s take on Nazi gas chambers at the time they were cranked up and running at full bore is recalled. Pope-led “Firm and consistent action” helped get six million people killed, thankyouverymuch, so he can just shut the fuck up … and why would anyone ask his opinion, anyway?

This conference and the press around it is exactly the sort of UN bullshit that winds me up and gets this monkey drumming like mad, beating out the same bloody tune again in hopes of putting a tiny dent in the image so carefully crafted and maintained by one of the world’s great PR machines.

Of course, I wouldn’t need to make much fuss at all if we could all take a look at the bill for this forum .. that would rather nutshell the whole game and draw a thick, black line under what the UN is really all about.

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