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Archive for July 25th, 2008

I was prepared for this … sort of … a black hole drawing me in once the few weeks of busy prep and positive attention for the book launch was over, but like so much these days, it’s worse than expected.

I’m back to tears and constant shaking, and it takes all the juice I have to keep the kids on what level ground I can create for them. Loneliness is eating me alive, and sadness has me for dessert.

I know I need to find something to focus on, a couple of bootstraps to pull myself up by, but right now I just don’t have it in me. I’m hoping something changes once my birthday/anniversary-of-falling-in-love-with-Mark, is behind me, as it looms with all the power of 15 years of memories and a future of dashed hope.

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