A long-tailed tropic bird lifts and turns and swoops over my valley, sculpting shapes from the morning breeze while brandishing a glint of the rising sun on white wings.
It’s going to be a hot one today; clear, yet steamy with the infusion of last night’s rain upping the humidity ante considerably — not a bad thing, being good for the skin and all.
And so begins the last day of my decade that starts with a five.
In reading over words others have written on approaching senectitude I find myself nodding in agreement with some, railing against others, and taking some comfort in the idea I’m far from alone in my ponderings and in interesting company.
To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable. ~Oscar Wilde
I’m sixty tomorrow (Did I just write that?), still too young to use the word “spry” when self-identifying, so figure Judith Regan’s line can be useful: The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible.
I can do that. Most of the time.
Anniversaries of my birth, however, have long been cause for itchy, scratchy contemplation, and the round numbers ever more so.
There is still no cure for the common birthday.
~John Glenn
As I write, the kids are off with Gay plotting something for the occasion, their enthusiasm bubbling over, excitement erupting in giggles from Cj and admonishments from Sam to keep the bubbles as thoughts so as not to spoil surprises.
Cute and wonderful as it is, the numbers stick in my throat as Cj’s six years get multiplied by ten in my mirror and I check out my reflection for its giggle factor. Single-parenting at 60 was not in the draft of any plan I recall making, but for the life of me I can’t imagine what I’d be doing now if I didn’t have these two marvels keeping my giggle factory up and running.
It’s funny how life loops around, where a wonky trajectory leads, and how stacking decades fashions unexpected architecture that manages to weather storms, deflect shit asteroids and remain standing even with foundations set in jello.
When I indulge myself and send up birthday wish-shaped smoke signals they look like more conventional structures with security struts, corridors that lead somewhere predictable, doors that open and stay that way, closed doors with working locks, storerooms stocked with other than anxiety. But after 59 years of sending such into the cosmos I’m not expecting much more than an ash blowback.
The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.
~H.L. Mencken
Have I lived 59 years and 364 days unwisely? I can hear the “You betcha! You’ve done some really stupid shit!” from here, yet regrets, I have a few, but, then again, too few to mention. Rather a waste of time and energy at this point in the journey.
When looking at it all backwards it’s hard to feel remorse when what could be considered mistakes in judgement manifested in some wonderful ways. None of my children are acts of contrition and some of the dumbest things I’ve done have wrangled themselves into experiences it would not have been good to miss.
The first forty years of life give us the text; the next thirty supply the commentary on it.
~Arthur Schopenhauer
Seems turning toward 60 I’m still gathering material … commentary to follow if there’s ever the time … and although it’s with neither enthusiasm nor delight I hit this wall — more trepidation and its accompanying angst — I have always been a fan of irony.
Dear Sassy S
Err, well my dear, happy birthday! I once heard a woman say that at 40 – wisdom and clarity start to appear (I guess that’s a little true), at 50 most of the bullshit is gone (don’t know about that one yet), 60 wasn’t mentioned so let me know…(Btw you don’t look 59 going on 60)
My youngest son turns 18 tomorrow, he is excited and nervous about the responsibility of becoming a legal adult. When he was younger he always got a kick out of having the same birthday as Harry Potter… (something you also share)
I reflect now on how it can be that my baby is going to be an adult…
But you know what, as I raise my glass to cheer my son tomorrow, I will also send a nod in your direction. Your blogs are always interesting and worth reading (I curse your kokonet or what ever it is called when it is down). So thank you for the blogs and may there be many more to come.
HIP HIP HOORAY!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND KEEP GIGGLING!
Love K
Thanks, Katherine.
Harry Potter, JK Rowling, your son and me. Good company.
~smiles~ nice one… and all I can really say is that getting older sure beats the alternative even though it does not seem so every now and then. It is funny to look back (even though the path behind me is only half of yours) but does seem that everything in life is a lesson in some form or another, however when we show up for exams, graduate and move to bigger and better places I am unsure. Maybe all there is to life lessons is the occasional pop quiz and the only time we put on the graduation cap is when life is done. But hell we do have many discussions to have, provoke thoughts, me annoy the hell out of you in the most charming way until that time 😉 so even though it is a day early, happy birthday dear
Thank you, Bobby. Feel free to annoy whenever …
I’m so glad you posted this, Sandra. The other day I was thinking about your birthday wondering if I had missed it somehow.
What you’ve written here resonates all to well. I’m following close behind. I question what it is all for, or about and lately started to make up my own answers. (To hell with what others think.)
I’m happy I found your blog last year, it’s helped me laugh, giggle, cry, savour and ponder. Your goodness shines through every post I read. I’m a big fan of good people.
Hope you have a really happy birthday, Sandra and many more to come. There is much life left to live and write about yet. I am honoured to be on the reading end.
Wish you all the very best.
What a lovely birthday gift, Marianne! Thank you for being here, and for taking your time to make mine so very much nicer.
Dear Sandra,
Happy Bithday!!!
Remember –Sixty is the new fourty!!!
Love your Blog
Give my regards to Seychelles…
Petra
… and gray is the new brunette …
If my sixties are anything like THE sixties, I’m guessing a good time will be had.
Thanks, Petra. Seychelles says howdy … or “bonzou, Madam” … back atcha!
about stuff in your past: we all live our life going forward, regardless of regrets. Much agreement on the conundrum of sometimes situations we regret the most produce fruit in our lives we would not wish to give up. Happy Birthday, dear lady! and thanks as always, for the new word. curses on kukunet!
Merci, Amy.
Dear Sandra: Happy Birthday
Greeting from the way back machine of Derbt Ct. days, your old buddy Sue Ann! now prefers to be called Suzie, but the older neighbors still call me Sue Ann.
Anyway, forgive any typos or non words, it’s 6:40 am here and Suzie on the block just wants to wish you a very happy Bday . 60 is the new 50, at least, and it does beat the alterntive.”18 with 42 years experience”
As I said before , “Since The 60’s were great,so shall be your 60th year and beyond. ” Your friend was right, much more to write about and to live. so go forth and enjoy those children (what a blessing , one I never had), pet a dog in honor of our past dogs, and drink some champage
Thanks, Suzie. Kids enjoyed, dogs petted and champagne ahead …
I’ll say Happy Birthday now as one can never be sure if kokonet will be up and running tomorrow. I hope you have a lovely day and although I know we will never meet again in this life please remember that I have always cherished your friendship and you will always be my Princess. Perhaps in the next life we will find happiness together. Love you and miss you.
I would like to think there is still some time for us together ahead, but if that doesn’t work out there’s always next time!
I love you, Robbie. Always have. Always will.
Welcome to the ranks, Sandra. The sound of it seems to be worse than the reality, so far at least. The fact that we’ve reached it is a testament to stamina. Have a wonderful day!
Is stamina the same as balls, Alexa?
Yes, I think stamina equates to balls, although having a pair, whether or not you are born with them, helps.
Have heard I have more than a Chinese pingpong team …
Please forgive me for interrupting Sandra. Have you considered writing a book on it? I think it could be a best seller. I’d read it for sure.
You sure can keep me busy, Marianne! I haven’t yet finished the last book you suggested!
That one will be a best seller also. I just know it!
I need to get to work!
Happy Birthday, Sandra!
Most days, would you give up your current age for a younger one? I’m curious how you feel about that.
I don’t know how I will feel at ninety — if I live that long — but I’m mostly happy with my current age of 54. It seems both my understanding and feelings have matured a bit, and in a way I rather like.
Thanks, Paul.
I wouldn’t have minded if my age had fallen into a groove at about 42 and stayed there, as long as life continued on. Fifty-four would be an okay place to hang for 10 or 15 years, too. Because it must all keep spinning, however, I don’t mind going round and round … even when it’s occasionally dizzying. (Actually, I like that part!)
Have a good one my friend. I’d raise a Seybrew to you but….OK G&T will have to do. Take care Sandra. Happy sixtieth…xx
Thanks.
Like your quotable lines. I’m a quote hound myself!
Thanks. Other people’s great words are good to draw wisdom from.